yellow buds + sunlight pebbles

I don’t want to drown in your confusion. Don’t take me with you. You smile and I melt. But leave me be. Your world is not ready for mine. My heart is here. You're mind is still wandering. I know what I want. You are still exploring. Don’t pull me into your current. The waves are compelling—you make them that way. But fast and steady, you are dangerous for me. My limbs can only swim against you for so long. Please don’t ever try to be something more. It’s too painful... You take more than you are willing to give. I cannot sustain such a relationship. So while you figure yourself out, I will be living my life. I will always be your friend. I will always lend a helping hand and a listening ear. But no more can I give you anything else because I cannot trust my own intentions. I cannot trust myself alone with you. Your eyes are mesmerizing. Your touch too powerful. Your lips so plush. Your manliness, so strong. Your mind so beautiful. I can’t help but want more. Your words so comforting. Please distance yourself and let it be. I don’t know your true intentions. But whatever they be, it’s ok. I am woman enough to let things go unspoken. No regrets. Smile and kiss me goodbye. Hold my hand one last time. I will always be your friend. Sadly that is all. Thank you for all the sweet, sweet memories. I will cherish them always. I wish things were different. But you are too selfish to ever learn to love. I’m too willing to make things work when you are too distant. I will always love you—if even from a distance.

temporary Bliss

You make my heart hurt-- as if you do it intentionally. 

You fog my world. 

My perception? Cloudy. 

My head spins with confusion... 

Why do I let people like you affect me in such ways? 

This power you have, I do not know of where it stems. 

But its presence, I wish, would cease and leave me be in harmony. 

Your world collides with mine. 

You make me weak. 

You make me a "woman;" a being that I resent and show remorse for. 

You make me sulk. 

You make me long for tears that will never spring from my eyes. 

You make me upset. 

Disappointed. Mad. Sad....full of melancholy, because you prevent my mind from thinking straight. 

You frustrate my life--make it complicated, when it could be easy. 

You exasperate everything. 

You make me feel broken, only after you’ve made me feel whole. 

Your arrogance doesn’t even know that you have this affect on me. 

You playfully ruin my existence without a care in the world. 

You live day by day in your own selfish circle, destroying the very existence of my being because you refuse to let me a part of your life. 

You create agony within my soul. 

You make me feel lost without you. 

But you don’t even know I am here. 

I am of no importance to you. 

And that, my dear friend, hurts beyond description. 

I wish you could hold me. 

Kiss me. Make it better. Comfort me. Love me. 

But you have no idea what is going on. 

Your oblivion is everywhere. 

And to you, I am obsolete. 

I hope you find what you are looking for. 

My heart will beat for you always. 

Farewell my dearest friend. 

Thank you for the temporary bliss. 

pink Cotton lust

Do you think of me the way I dream of you? 

Do you wish I was there the way I wish you were here? 

Does your mind swirl with thoughts of me? 

Do you ever feel the need to kiss me, hold me, be near to me? 

Do you want me the way I need you? 

I pray you do.
My heart pounds with every breath I take because I’m thinking of you. 

I imagine your smile, your laughter. 

It makes me happy to think of you, to be with you. 

My world spirals when you are not near. 

When you’re gone, I feel lost and lonesome. 

 Hold me tightly, never let me go. 

I beg of you. 

Kiss me lightly and whisper sweet sensuous melodies in my ear. 

Stroke my body with your calloused hands; touch my every needing soul. 

Press yourself on my skin. 

Linger your scent over mine, inhale and breathe me in. 

Let our lives intertwine together harmoniously. 

They will link as one. 

Meant to be. 

Allow it to surface. 

Don’t be afraid. 

Relinquish yourself to me. 

I will love you now and forever. 

If you let me in, I will be there. 

My loyalty will always and only be for you. 

Because there is something about you that makes me the way I am and the person you deserve to have. 

Let me be the apple in your eye. 

Love me as I have always loved you...

love Orchids red beauty

You want me but you won't admit it.
Our lives mesh but you hold back.
Its ok. I understand you. When you’re ready
I should be here. Because there is something more
Powerful than either you or I can comprehend.
Our stubbornness. Our defiance. 
They breathe on each other.
When we are together-it feels right.
You feel it. You just can’t admit it. 
I will never succumb before you do. 
It’s in your hands. I know you will take the reins.
And I will wait patiently. 
As patiently as I can. 
No strings attached. That is us. Forever.
Even after everything. 
Even if there is more. 
I will always be me—just for you and
You will always be you. 
Which is why I adore you. 
Which is why I let you see me in my rawest form. 
My most vulnerable state. Because I know
You care and you will make it better. 
With your words and then your touch.
I hope that is how it will always be.