Forgiven Bliss

I forgive you.  My heart still hurts--I wonder that the pain will never go away.  The sadness lulling in my throat...I imagine a part of it will always remain.  But this sorrow will pass.  I won't blame you.  I'm lost without you, yet your deception also set me free.  You tortured my heart and crushed my dreams.  But I forgive you.  I will move on and bury these feelings of regret.  I do not regret having met you--only that I could have been so believing and put my life into your trusting hands.  I was the foolish one.  To each their own.  But I will forgive you. That is my resolution.  Curse my future decisions should I fall into such another trap. This depression, at times, is overwhelming.  Its presence because of you.  But I will not hold it against you.  I will not lash out.  I've made such a fool of myself in my childish attempts to win your heart and to be noticed.  But that is the lesson I have put upon myself, and the only one to blame is me.

I forgive you for your lies--for your beautiful smiles and your loving touch.  I forgive you for the comfort you gave me when you were near and the emptiness you bestowed upon me while so many nights away.  I forgive you for always leaving me wondering and for ignoring my existence.  I forgive you for all of those promises you never kept and the dreams you filled in my head.  I forgive you for being so wonderful in my eyes--even if it was because of my own deceptions. I forgive you for hurting me this much.  I forgive you for leaving me and for making me suffer.  I forgive you for this loneliness that makes me weep every night.  I forgive you for taking away every ounce of happiness and hope in my body.  I forgive you for your selfishness and your ignorance towards love.  I forgive you for being you.  But most of all--I forgive myself for believing you.